christmas past

When my grandmother was alive, Christmas Day nearly always looked something like this.  Chaos, people everywhere, wrapping paper everywhere, and when my brother and I were small, we were everywhere.  It was not something I particularly enjoyed.  See, my brother and I are both much younger than the rest of my cousins, so we were the little kids crashing the adult party.  My favourite part of Christmas was always the very early morning, when it was just our little family opening presents and delving through stockings.

However, ever since my grandmother passed away, the family has fractured.  My mom's siblings who have grandkids are now making their own family traditions.  Now that Christmases are just us, and sometimes my aunt, I find that I miss the chaos and noise.  Go figure.

This year, a family friend asked me to sing with her church choir during the month of December.  Her church is the one my grandmother attended until she died, it's where my parents were married, and where I was baptized.  Being there reminds me so much of her, how she always had tissues squirreled away in her pockets and sleeves, how she made her own harmonies up as she sang the hymns.  My grandmother was an ever present part of my life and I miss her all the time, but never more than at Christmas.